speak of the devil

i know i havent written anything lately and for that im sorry.
i havent felt much like writing and explaining whats going on in my life.

 the lake was...well the lake...i got drunk, mad bad choices and saw things i didnt wanna see in regards to Kory.

i went on a date with a boy.
it was a good date, hes a sweet guy, he opened the truck door for me and everything.
i know he would be good to just as the bouncer would have been (not sure if i mentioned him but its in the past or at the twig on a random thurs night) but i just dont think im ready to give him what he wants from me in terms of time and emotions.


last night i was on fb round 1030 and who do i start talking to...James!!

its so funny with him, i just dont know what to think or how to feel anymore. my feelings for him have NOT changed in the last 5 yrs and i think he knows that. he asked if i was still in Regina and i said not im back in Stoon since last january and i said why? ya miss me? ( i was totally kidding around) he said yes i do, i told him to take a day off and come visit cause i missed him too and he said maybe this weekend....so thats where it stands with him as far as right now....
we do this. we come together for a bit then part then come back together and i know he wants a wife and the farm and the whole package and if it wasnt for australia i would jump in head first with both feet and not think twice cause i want that all too but i cant change what i want just cause he breezes back into my life after a year and a half.

i will keep you updated....