so yesterday after Troy left Joelle asked me if i really felt awkward around him and i said kinda but i think i always will to a certain extent which makes me sad cause i always felt me and Troy were pretty good friends so she said that Troy kinda feels the same way and is kinda nervous to be around me b/c of what the ex said to him (second last paragraph) anyway i said this is bullshit, me and TL had some really good talks back in the day and its dumb cause its almost a year later Troy still feels like he needs to be careful around it all....the ex wasnt careful when he cheated and was with her two weeks after we broke up although Joelle did say that the ex asks Troy about me which is weird why the fuck would he care??? he dosent get to know those things anymore, he made that choice and he has to live with it cause it will be a cold cold day in hell before i ever forgive him for hurting me like that and there is no way that i will ever be friends with him (sorry little bitterness came out there)
anyway i wanted to write and give a little explanation for my blues the last few days, ive decided that next time Troy is around im gonna say this is dumb there is no reason we cant be kinda friends or whatever....im gonna be in Joelle's life and therefore in some weird way in his so he needs to get over whatever awkwardness there is with the ex
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